Monday 13 August 2007

Am I a Stepford?!



We saw the last half hour of the movie Stepford Wife last night. the one with Nicole Kidman and Matthew Broderick. from what i understood, the wives were programmed to be robots and to be the "perfect" wives where they are dressed in perfect dresses, have the perfect bodies, hair was perfect, where everything's rosey, and the language spoken were formally polite (i should think so).

This was what happened just a while ago:

Hardy was in the garden, I was washing the dishes in the kitchen, not far away from him with the door open. Spotted Aidan is sitting quietly on his chair observing his parents.

Hardy: "hey, i can hear music coming from the park! there must be some sort of a concert"
Zaza: "where? which park? the park near our house tu?"
Hardy: "ye"
Zaza: "what's the name of that park eh?"
Hardy: "entah..."

Zaza then politely corrected Hardy in a low voice by saying "tak tahuuuuuu..."

2 mins later...

Aidan still sitting on his chair whilst holding his teether toy, eyeing on a fly flying around...

Zaza: "alamak! lalat ni dah masok la"
Hardy: "amik kan benda tu" (that thing where you kill the flies)
Zaza then passes over that 'thing' to Hardy
"ZAPPPPPPP!"
Hardy: "ha.. mampus dah..."

Zaza then politely corrected Hardy in a low voice by saying "matiiiiiiii..."

Hardy: "mama's becoming a stepford wife dah!"

I laughed to it and so did he, aidan looking at us with a blur face. i later then realised, hey! that was not a compliment! i doubt he meant that i have the perfect body! i doubt he's happy with what i'm wearing (i was wearing my t and my capri pants), my hair is far from Nicole Kidman's. maybe he's telling me that i'm being too perfect? perhaps it was the words that i choose - tak tahu instead of entah. mati instead of mampus.

(i'm laughing whilist typing this!)

Anyway, i've been told and taught never ever to use those two words. i was taught that those words were harsh. i remember my grandmother would give us that stern face if she hears those words.. i've never heard those two words from my parents... but my husband said it is not wrong, and from what he's been used to, it is not harsh as well, except for the second one, perhaps it is a little bit harsh. but it was only to a fly!

So now what do we do? we have a kid and one parent believes A and the other parent believes B. i then asked Hardy, what do we teach Aidan? perhaps we should speak another language? Hardy then quickly said, of course we wont use those words, we will teach him the right words, the polite one = what mama said!

But just curious, to those who are reading this, seriously, are they impolite? harsh words?

10 comments:

Ann always said...

ntah, tak tahu

heheheh...just kidding.

never thot about it to be honest. i use those two words pretty regularly tho.

Theta said...

Zaza,
Maybe Entah and Mampus have that 'kasar'/harsh tone to them that some people don't like.

I also was not brought up to use those words - although I didn't get glares if I were to say them. My parents just don't say those words in front of me, so I don't know such words exist to use them! Haha!

But funnily enough, my mom regularly spews out some 'interesting' vocabs if she's being spooked/'melatah'!

Which I shall not dirty your blog with... ;D

ZazaHardy said...

ann: lawak la hang!!! :P

theta: good to know that that someone else other than me dont use them!

melatah is one good topic to share!! my mum's hillarious!! my grandma's lagi terok!! hahahaha...

Z

M A Janssen said...

I think 'Entah' is pretty normal but I can understand how to some people 'Mampus' may be pretty harsh. I'm very expressive myself & have been known to use very harsh words both Malay and English but I believe that as long as you use the words without malice, it's OK because Aidan will also learn that that's just how his parents express themselves. I've heard other parents use a lot harsher and even vulgar words so don't be so hard on yourself - it's all part of our Malay language!

Anonymous said...

zaza, im biased, i think entah is ok (cause i use it) but mampus is harsh (cause i don't use it) heh.

thewharfer

kaezrin said...

hmmm hows aidan coping now?? dah baik ker pox dier

Anonymous said...

Entah for me is ok but tak tahu is better answer. Mampus is a bit harsh...kene cakap dgn muka yg penuh ekspresi. normally kalau tengah naik hangin boleh terkeluar perkataan "M" tu....

anyway, hope your aidan i getting better rite now!

Anonymous said...

erm rasenye u could say, satu tuh bahasa pasar - the mampus word, usually said within friends, hardly in front of mom n dad lah. the the other is bahasa text book! btw, aidan dah baik? kecik2 takde scars bila besar, that's one positive thing. hope e'thing is great at your end. -yaya

Anonymous said...

I suppose saying words like "mampus" is not that harsh...depending on the state of your mind, situation and subject. I would definitely say that to a 'f'irritating and filthy fly but not to a human being or a crazy driver overtaking me from the left or even a kiasu cutting my line...but to an insect definitely, especially if it’s a cockroach. Then again, children pay attention and subconsciously they are picking up words and actions faster than we realize.

Don't you think so zaza?

hugs for little aidan and mommy.
Auntie Nadia

ZazaHardy said...

mus: ni baru kita nya cerita, same culture.. have you guys encountered similar situations where david says and believes one and you believes the other?

the wharfer: mampus is harsh even to a fly kan??

kaezrin: aidan is well now thank you. he's up and about and back to jumping!! still some scars on his body and face but i hope it'll go off soon!

k.linad: to me kan, even with a smiley face cakap mampus pon is harsh! hehe. apa lagi bila naik angin kan? aidan is better now k.linad! thank you so much for asking!

yaya: i think amongst friends should be ok. depends on your friends jugak kan. but i dont use it even to my friends. so ok lah, i use bahasa text book!! :P
we used the cream you mentioned - neem. i can imagine how worried you were masa naufal's time dapat chicken pox!! i wouldnt want any mom to go through it kalau boleh!! heartbreaking!!!

auntie nadia: i absolutely love your comment!!! funny la you! i agree with you totally, kids will pick up easily and really fast! i use the word "jatuh" quite a lot coz i kept dropping things lately and aidan's been dropping his toys on the floor from his chair. and now he can actually say "jatuh"! i wouldnt want him to say "mampus" or "entah" later! we really ought to filter our words!! how's hana?! all our love to you guys!

Z