Wednesday, 9 January 2008


Hardy warned me of 2008. he warned me that he'll be taking up a new role at work. he warned me that he'll be doing a lot of travelling. he warned me that there will be lots of adjustments at work. he warned me that there will be times when i have to deal with things myself, make decisions on my own, run errands without him.

I am not really that independent girl sometimes. or maybe cause i just want to do things with him around? maybe i simply love his company too much and want him to be by my side? ok.. ok... so i am not that independent... and now, 2008 is here.

This is by no means my new years resolution. i dont make them, never in fact. they can be very unrealistic some times. i reckon these are real, besides, this is something i should be doing, all year round...

I hereby announce that i will try my outmost best to:
be much more independent (like driving Faizal to Eindhoven Airport this Saturday, just Aidan and me), i will be calmer (tak cepat melenting), i'll be confident of myself (confident enough to sell of my crafts), i'll be less gullible (they always fool me! them to blame partly!), i'll drive safelier (after having had 2 scratches on the car. but hey! left hand drive and a car of 5 mtrs long, takes time ok!), hope i'll manage the house better (like ironing Hardy's office shirts at least 5 of them in 3 days!), i'll be less cengeng and be stronger (by not worrying and crying when hardy says he has to go to some country for a week), less dwelling (5-15 mins is enough) , be smarter (think smart and not let other people step on me), be able to say "NO" when i should (like when someone wants to sell you something that you dont really need), eat healthy (will have to cut down on rice and those bloody good potatoes!), look better (no more going out when hair's wet, but at least i put on some make up and gloss! ), and not to mention manage our finances better this year.

I just hope 2008 will bring more exciting days, happy times, plenty of good adventures, good holidays, good health for all, loads of fond memories together, more good deeds to others, be even more thankful and grateful to God, be as green as we can to protect the environment, smile more and love more!

Its just 9 days into 2008 and Hardy's already in Lyon, France. and starting this weekend he'll be away for the whole week. i know i should get used to this by now. afterall, we know of this even before coming here that he'll have to travel. oh... come on zaza, you can do it...



Cat Cat said...

Take it easy. Work on one thing at a time.. Today run errand, tomorrow do laundry, the following day, kemas rumah... No rush. Just relax and you will be fine.

I am Ann said...

zaza, we're in the same boat. i start my driving lesson next week(to convert my msian license)!!! while the hubby's off to china for the week.

mº¿ºsh, brecht & nora said...

Dearest ZaZa, i wish you, hardy & aidan all the best for 2008! may it be filled with joy, laughters and veryvery good health! I wish u to zaZa, tons of luck with this new 'parental' situation with Hardy away alot. I am certain it will be tough at first but you will prevail and get your own rythm of things to come. Worry not dear zaza, email me anytime if u feel like screaming or just talking, it can be alot 'raising' a kid 'alone'. My hats off to you for being brave just by agreeing to do this, i dont think i'll manage without B around.

Anonymous said...

Happy to see you back in the blogsphere and glad that Aidan is recovering well! Don't worry about not having Hardy around as much much as you'd like, Aidan will always be there for you!

Happy New Year!


Theta said...

I was a needy oen when my hubby had to attend a two-week intensive course (meeting for five times during the year) when we're staying for the same duration in Holland. :)

I managed to fill the time with some activities with Sadia. Walking around helps too, but only when Sadia cooperated to sit still in her pram! :D

Take care Zaza (and Aidan). You're a strong person.
And just holler in case you need help!

zuraida said...

Zaza, happy new year & good luck. I'm confident that you will manage all those things!

k.ct said...

zaza boleh !!!!!!!!!

London a Treu Destination away from Cape Town said...

Happy new year to you to zaza i want to email u a pic of us at gap i founf it amongst my uni stuff. I hoe you wll All the best Lots love abbey

Swahili said...

Hi Za.
Welcome Home. Relax ok, being a housewife is a 24hour job - we are all imperfect in our own little ways. Remember that and you will conquer one mountain at a time.

Aidan has the winter cold, it seems. Harris too. Lots of love and fluid, dilute his milk if hes still drinking frm bottle.

Happy NY..see my blog. I got ribbons tips, good for you.

Kak Shasha said...

Hi za!
Don't worry....we all know how determined a person u are. I'm sure you'll manage everything in a breeze....Take things slowly. Hey....if i can manage doing everything and '4' times more....zaza mesti 'senang kacang' quoting afi each time he comes back from a test/exam.heee...heee....Z you're an angel in disguise and i have the outmost confidence in you, my little sister. Anyway if you need us we're just a call away. love you all much...take brave...
Kak Shasha

Aidan's Mama & Papa said...

cat: true but the thing with me is that i have to make everything all clean and ready, folded and wiped. otherwise, i cant sit still or i'd feel so rimas!

ann: kalau la baden tu dekat... kan senang! good luck with the driving lessons! you'll ace it. fortunately for me, i dont have to convert mine, under skilled migrant workers, spouce pon dapat convert!!

mush: dont underestimate yourself, i'm sure you'll manage without B just fine should he go away a day or two. you're one strong girl, stronger than me i'm sure. we wish the 3 of you all the best in 2008!

tw: aidan's my best friend these days... heheh... happy new year to you and ik. hope to meet up one day! been doing alot of shopping tak? any new cath lately? :)

theta: how on earth can those single parents do it kan? ni baru 1 week dah nangis teresak esak... ish ishhh...

k.zue: thanks k.zue. parents k.zue dah selamat balik haji ke? hardy buat umrah on friday lepas kerja insyaallah...

k.ct: thanks for the vote of confidence.

abbey: oh my god! you have a photo of us at GAP! gimme gimme gimme! my email is how do i look? hahaha..
my dear, our love and all the very best to the 4 of you in 2008. hope to see you guys soon, insyaallah!

swahili: its good to be home. but minus the chores, ironing and cleaning etc... haha. yea i know one at a time but i simply cant see those dirty clothes in the baskets, i cant see those dusts on the shelves... i cant sit still lah!

how's harris doing? has he recovered?

thanks for the ribbon tip. i first saw it on martha's living and wedding magazine back in the 90s. didnt have the tool to make it then but will surely try to one day. brilliant kan? hardy made me this rail for me to put all my ribbons, but still not enough space! thanks for sharing dear!

btw, hardy's in riyadh the whole week!

k.shasha: i'm not so determined la k.sha. lagi determined than me. and we thought you're the gembeng one...heheh... but look at you!!! you're even stronger than both of us!!! thanks for the vote of confidence k.sha. so far aidan's ok and we're enjoying each other's company. i'm teaching him alif, ba, ta so that papa dia balik saudi nanti ada la trick baru mak dia ajar! haha. i'm still cengeng, still gembeng but trying really hard not to show it in front of hardy! take care and love to all the kids!


Anonymous said...

Everdearest Zaza (Fpr your eyes only)....

This story tells us something about LOVE & LIFE.

My husband is an engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.

Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.

I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband is my complete opposite; his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE.

One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

"Why?" he asked, shocked.

"I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!" I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament, so what else could I expect from him?

And finally he asked me: "What can I do to change your mind?"

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered: "Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind.

Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?"

He said: "I will give you your answer tomorrow...."

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes....

My dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but....please allow me to explain the reasons further.....

This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.

"When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city. I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month. I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.

You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs.

So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand...and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the colour of the glow on your young face...

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die ... "

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting...and as I continue on reading... "Now, that you have finished reading my answer, and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk...

I rushed to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread....Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's LIFE, and LOVE. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms; even in very small and cheeky forms. It has never been a model. It could be the dullest and most boring form ..

Flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands...AND THAT'S LIFE.

"There is some self-interest behind every friendship. There is no friendship without self-interests. This is a bitter truth."

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect.